Thank you for giving me so many memories and keeping me alive. It is you who made me more mature and given more angels to view this worlds. You have given reasons to smile, cry, live and to be a part of ongoing race. Thank you for boosting my believes and blessing me with Krishnas around.
Two days back when emotions were not allowing me to live simply, became frustrated with my own shadow and this time reason of my frustration was my past deeds. Were totally upset, agitated with my fate and like others i too had the same questions “WHY ME?” I don’t want more but a joker’s role in this busy world where i can perform for the audiences of my choice. Don’t know why my fate goes against my wish. The more i want to make others smile, the more they get disturbed, why god has given such life, such role to me? I’m not asking anything to anyone instead trying to understand others more and more, then why can’t they understand me? I’m trying to do good to others then why all bad comes in my account. Why can’t god bless me with a simple life?
I forget how many questions i had that day and all i wanted to say that i was completely broken and depressed.
I was not able to perform my normal duties. No one was there to value my tears but was crying and wanted to cry more and more. Confessing that it helps to forget the odd times but how many more days i would cry like this. Is this the life i wanted to live, Is this the way joker behave?
Brain suggested to go with my favorite activities but Joker was already flop in his role, he was not smiling but creating problems to others. Then what should he do now? Loneliness was killing more and more and in even in the late night was not able to sleep and then picked a book “The Promise” after reading preface, found it will again encourage me to live dreams/lies, so just left the idea to read a novel but was convinced that book can help and at least i would stop crying to read those texts.
And then Don’t know from where i got the Idea of Reading Shrimad Bhagwad Gita. I started reading and feeling good. I have read first few Prarthanas and Slokas and feel better and in last two days i am only reading this, agreed that not getting the real meaning but it has given me for what i was in search of last 24 years. Sharing a verse of This Holy Book.
“Everyone experiences conditions like pleasure and pain, heat and cold, due to contact of objects with the senses. The senses carry the sensations through the nerves to the mind. One should be able to withdraw the senses from objects, like the tortoise which withdraws all its limbs within. Krishna asserts that only one who has the capacity to be balanced in pleasure and pain alike is fit for
[The Supreme Soul, Shri Krishna Said This To Arjuna, in the battlefield of Kurukshetra, when Arjuna was agitated due to attachment and fear.]
Through Bhagwad Gita, I came to know that “One can overcome sin through Self-knowledge.”
He was dreaming and when he came out of dream, this reality was waiting to hug him with an another dream. Yes, It was a perfect Sunday Morning for Confusion, he slept yesterday very late and don’t know how many meaningless dreams he had.Today’s morning gifted the best to him. Her love, doubt was there for him.
Doubt, a beautiful lady who accidentally fell in love with confusion and then things were never normal but today this abnormal, sensual, loving daybreak was making confusion to feel like he is favorite and the most beloved child of Krishna.
Doubt and Confusion shared their love from morning to noon and things were going perfect for Confusion. But his dream cum reality did not long last and in early even, The Sunday came into action.
Superstitious confusion’s superstition proved right again and doubt fought with confusion and this time again she was right with her points.
What happened actually was, doubt logged in his social networks and get socked by seeing his n number of requests to unknown girls. It was not only reason for their fight but this confusion has chatted with another girl and had not informed to her. Now she asked for explanation and what this confusion that his answers are not going to change the things as she is not believing.
The girl about doubt asked was one of his best unseen friend meet on internet only and the n number of friend request about she is asking, confusion don’t know when he sent, may be in his early days, may be purposely in last 5 years of his career over network which he forget.
It was something where doubt were right and her questions were genuine but confusion have no answers, felt bad but was not able to make her believe that she means everything.
Now she is not picking his call and he don’t want to disturb the lady who he love.
Krishna Bless You Both.. N Sorry for posting your story here.
“After so many years….Sunday gave me smthng 2 smile..” it was confusion’s facebook status today and reason behind this status was BJP’s phenomenal win in state election. It has won 408 out of 589 seats, which is near 70% of the total seats. In excitement, he written for Pappu, Shown Namonia, Thanked New Voters and shown respect for AK Sir’s performance. It was like a perfect day for him, agreed that he was not performing but his team was winning so he too was excited and hopeful.
As it was a Sunday and this jobless joker has not much to do rather read his old stuffs. He started browsing and then glued to his blog, he liked one poem penned by him and he just shared that on his page. He didn’t realized that it was written for his past and The present whom he is living has a strong objection on it. But the poor guy without making any calculation he has shared his creativity.
Krishna, once he shared his poem, The Villain (Sunday) came into action and shown him his hell.
Doubt, who was busy whole day in church and then theater, came online and saw confusion’s posts where links were defining his past, she was unhappy and reasons were obvious. All she asked was why he recalled his past if he had nothing, why he has shared this post. She believes he is living his past and thinking that he is living present. She said to confusion that he is just pretending, not loving and have played with her emotion. Later she said she can’t live with a guy like confusion. She also texted him good bye and asked him to take care.
Confusion wanted to make her convince but she was not in a mood to listen, don’t know the actual number that how many times he has called and how many messages he has sent but it is 3:45 and he is still trying.
If he is pretending i must say he is not only joker but a good and responsible actor too. Well, Krishna bless you both.
(Sorry doubt n confusion that i am posting it. )
[Please forgive me for grammatical errors or should i remind you that Hindi is my first language but to reach you i am using in it.]
नदियां निश्छल दीवानी होती है,
जिन्हें सागर से मिलने कि बेचैनी होती है।
फूलों कि ख्वाहिश में भवरें,
मदहोश मदमस्त गाने गाते है।
और क्यूँ चांदनी रात में,
चकोर चंदा से शरमाते है।
मुहब्बत करके जाना है..!
हर सीनें में दिल होता है,
जिनको दिलबर की हसरत होती है।
नजरें लाख छुपाएं,
इनमें सनम का इन्तेजार होता है।
और उठते है वो हाथ दुआओं के लिए,
सीनें में जिनके मुहब्बत होता है।
Muhabbat karke jaana hai….!
Nadiyan, nischhal deewani hoti hai,
Jinhein Saagar se milane ki bechaini hoti hai..
Phulon ki khwahish mein bhanwarein,
madhosh, madmast gaane gate hai..
aur kyun chandni raat mein,
chakor chanda se sharmate hai…
Muhabbat karke jaana hai….!
Har seene mein dil hota hai,
Jinko dilbar ki hasrat hoti hai..
Najrein laakh chhupayein,
Inmein sanam ka intejaar hota hai..
Aur uthate hai wo haath duaaon ke liye,
Seene mein jinke muhabat hota hai..